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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

11.06.2025 14:42

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

Why cant school buses ditch kids who are late to the bus at the school? Like on the way home, if a kid is late when all the others arrived to the bus on time, why cant they leave the late kid behind since its not fair to the on time kids to wait?

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

By taking turns talking.

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

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By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.